wolfsbride (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wolfsbride) wrote2007-08-09 09:19 pm
wolfsbride) wrote2007-08-09 09:19 pm
Entry tags:
A Harry Potter V Movie Review
In a word....ARRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!
It has become apparent to me that I have a great many issues with the Potterverse and as such will in future need to be heavily sedated when watching or even discussing the events that transpire in said universe.
Points at which I wanted to strangle people:
1. When Molly shushes Sirius saying 'he's only a boy'. FUCK YOU MOLLY! He's never been 'only a boy' and you paying lip service isn't going to change that. He's only a boy doesn't save him from knowing that the people around him are going to die, from having a meglomanic hunting him down, from not knowing who the hell he can trust. I want everyone to shut the fuck up about him being just a boy and teach him how to survive what's coming. He's only a boy when it suits you, you bastards!
2. Dolores Umbridge. I actually liked her. She was deliciously evil. However, she does bring up a point that I always get stuck on during Potter movies. Can someone please tell me why in the name of all that's holy is the policy of Hogwarts apparently we shall do as much damage to our students as we can? Who in their right mind would send their kids to a school that has some of the most incompetent faculty I have ever had the displeasure of knowing? I can only assume from Trelawney's quivering 'but Hogwarts is my home', that Hogwarts isn't so much about having the best teachers available but more about being a halfway house for people who can not function in the regular world.
3. Sirius. I love him but he should be FUCKING INSANE! I don't know if it's glossed over in the book but movie Sirius is way too mentally healthy. Though, when he escaped he should have stayed as far away from Harry as possible, so maybe having Sirius look Harry up for a grand reunion is a nod to his insanity. Harry's not known for his sharp wit and cool head. Having Sirius egg him on was just asking for trouble. Which is what he got. Hearing him call Harry James killed me. I'm actually kind of glad he died when he did because I could see Sirius driving Harry mad with his expectations of Harry being James.
4. Dumble-FUCKING-dore! When he babbles to Harry about how he held himself back in the hopes that Tom wouldn't whatever. FUCK YOU AND YOUR BROTHER'S GOAT YOU BASTARD!!! Yeah, that's the way to protect Harry by totally running away and leaving him alone and wondering what the hell is going on. Enough said.
Points at which I squeed:
1. When Snape dragged Harry down to wherever and gives him the talking to before they start the lessons. My squee was enhanced by my non slasher friend turning to me and saying and I quote: "You know, you only chastise the ones you love. Snape loves him. People think he's being mean to Harry but he's really protecting him and trying to teach him how to protect himself." Quite honestly, it brought a tear to my eye. :)
2. Luna Lovegood. She sounds like she should be a porn star but she is in fact a quirky little girl who's actually bloody likeable. They casted her very well.
3. Neville. Wow. He's so tall now. And yay for him getting his spell to work right.
4. Harry being all teachery. So masterful. :)
So over all:
Special effects: 7/10
Plot: 8/10
Blood Pressure: 170/100 :D
It has become apparent to me that I have a great many issues with the Potterverse and as such will in future need to be heavily sedated when watching or even discussing the events that transpire in said universe.
Points at which I wanted to strangle people:
1. When Molly shushes Sirius saying 'he's only a boy'. FUCK YOU MOLLY! He's never been 'only a boy' and you paying lip service isn't going to change that. He's only a boy doesn't save him from knowing that the people around him are going to die, from having a meglomanic hunting him down, from not knowing who the hell he can trust. I want everyone to shut the fuck up about him being just a boy and teach him how to survive what's coming. He's only a boy when it suits you, you bastards!
2. Dolores Umbridge. I actually liked her. She was deliciously evil. However, she does bring up a point that I always get stuck on during Potter movies. Can someone please tell me why in the name of all that's holy is the policy of Hogwarts apparently we shall do as much damage to our students as we can? Who in their right mind would send their kids to a school that has some of the most incompetent faculty I have ever had the displeasure of knowing? I can only assume from Trelawney's quivering 'but Hogwarts is my home', that Hogwarts isn't so much about having the best teachers available but more about being a halfway house for people who can not function in the regular world.
3. Sirius. I love him but he should be FUCKING INSANE! I don't know if it's glossed over in the book but movie Sirius is way too mentally healthy. Though, when he escaped he should have stayed as far away from Harry as possible, so maybe having Sirius look Harry up for a grand reunion is a nod to his insanity. Harry's not known for his sharp wit and cool head. Having Sirius egg him on was just asking for trouble. Which is what he got. Hearing him call Harry James killed me. I'm actually kind of glad he died when he did because I could see Sirius driving Harry mad with his expectations of Harry being James.
4. Dumble-FUCKING-dore! When he babbles to Harry about how he held himself back in the hopes that Tom wouldn't whatever. FUCK YOU AND YOUR BROTHER'S GOAT YOU BASTARD!!! Yeah, that's the way to protect Harry by totally running away and leaving him alone and wondering what the hell is going on. Enough said.
Points at which I squeed:
1. When Snape dragged Harry down to wherever and gives him the talking to before they start the lessons. My squee was enhanced by my non slasher friend turning to me and saying and I quote: "You know, you only chastise the ones you love. Snape loves him. People think he's being mean to Harry but he's really protecting him and trying to teach him how to protect himself." Quite honestly, it brought a tear to my eye. :)
2. Luna Lovegood. She sounds like she should be a porn star but she is in fact a quirky little girl who's actually bloody likeable. They casted her very well.
3. Neville. Wow. He's so tall now. And yay for him getting his spell to work right.
4. Harry being all teachery. So masterful. :)
So over all:
Special effects: 7/10
Plot: 8/10
Blood Pressure: 170/100 :D