Feb. 1st, 2012

wolfsbride: (dream)
Omg! The year is one month gone already. Whoa.

Hm. Time to take stock. All things considered, things are going so so. On the one hand, physically mother is doing well. On the other hand, emotionally, I think she's bored and perhaps a bit depressed even. But she never wants to do anything or go anywhere and she can't do games or anything that requires mental cohesion, so until she gets over that I don't want to go out thing, she's out of luck.

Financially, I'm still trying to get something that will let me deal with the bank. I need to poke the specialist again. I think it's getting past the receptionist that's the problem. Some of those girls are like Nazis or something. You'd think THEY were paying the doctor they way they refuse to pass on messages. I may have to actually MAKE an appointment to see him just to ask my two stupid questions.

On the food front dinner is still hit and miss. I think I either need to confiscate her tea or find some way of getting the timing better. She's filling up on tea I think. Also, you know how grown up kids have a rude awakening when they hear themselves say something to their kids that their parents always said to them and they swore they'd never say to their kids? Today I said to my mom, no candy before dinner. I mean it's another thing for her to fill up on. I think I'm going to have to not give it to her when I buy it because she'll just eat the whole thing and not even think about eating regular food. And yeah, we had that conversation too, while standing in the kitchen.

In the meantime, I've decided I'm going to stop trying so hard. I've been reading a bit about Taoism and working with things instead of against them. So I'm going to try to work on the things I can actually do something about and let the rest go. I was making us both miserable the other way. We'll see how it goes.

My Alzheimers class has been helpful, not in a practical way since most of the stuff I've figured out on my own, but in the way of listening to where other people are at. Most of the people in my class are stilling working through the denial to acceptance stage. I've been really fortunate that my life attitude seems to be okay, we have a problem. Let's deal with it and get on with life. I've never seen the point of being all wah wah woe is me why me. I don't know. Maybe that attitude just attracts more problems to me. Sometimes it sure seems like it. But that's my attitude and I think I'll keep it.

December 2012

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